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Re: do you still do things when you're depressed? » tampagirl70

Posted by Scott in Vermont on June 18, 2004, at 14:01:58

In reply to do you still do things when you're depressed?, posted by tampagirl70 on June 18, 2004, at 12:28:15

I use the enormous negative energy I have to clean things. This last week I re-organized my tool boxes, labeled them with content description, and then built a new shelf for them to sit on. When I'm depressed I'm usually really angry that I am depressed and I try to fight it.

If I can't fight it and it really hammers me, I cry in a corner or I get drunk and sleep or I eat like I'm starving and play the same video game I have played about a billion times before. It's mindless and it passes time but I still have to pay attention enough to not get "killed", and I notice that I develop and unhealthy connection to the character and I do everything I can to keep him alive, perhaps it's a metaphor for keeping myself alive?

I should mention that all the above is when I don't have to be at work. If I'm crashing and it's during the work week, I suck it up, bring it to work with me, and sit at my desk crying and wishing I would die in my cube via natural causes. I try to take time off on my worst days, but I've had an awful lot of "worst days" in the last couple of months and I'm running out of time off quickly.

I really hope this stops. But today I'm HAPPY! Like toooooo happy... I'm on a raging upswing (just in time for the weekend! Roadtrip anyone?)

-Scott


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poster:Scott in Vermont thread:357821
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