Posted by littlep24 on June 18, 2004, at 12:24:14
In reply to Re: LOSS OF FEELINGS, posted by deirdrehbrt on June 17, 2004, at 17:28:49
Dee,
Thanks for your thoughts. We have gone to my therapist together and he really tries to understand, however, when things really get bad and I can't keep up with life he forgets all that he has learned. Understanding what I have brought into the marriage is key because the way I respond to many incidents he feels that I am attacking him when I am not it is more that I don't know how to cope with the issue. An example of this is he is good at doing home improvements and has done over two of our bathrooms. People come into our house and say how beautiful and what a wonderful job he has done. I have never been the type to be overjoyed at anything even the birth of my children. I just said oh yea I am happy to have them with no enthusiasm. I would tell him the bathroom looks nice and go on with my day; this really hurt him because it took him many hours after working his own job to complete it. Due to the way I react to many issues is part of why I want a divorce. I feel like I have betrayed him for not being able to be happier and complement (not sure this is the correct word) him for his efforts. On that note I am trying to sort through a really deep issue for me. I am the type of person that tries to validate all my actions and thoughts by looking for approval from everybody. Alot of people do this but I am extreme. I am disgusted by the way I BETRAY my husband because I talk about our issues to everyone and their mother trying to validate that he is the source of our problems. Then when he is around these people they shy away from him. It isn't fair to him and that is why I think we should part our ways because I have betrayed him.
poster:littlep24
thread:357135
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040611/msgs/357820.html