Posted by Tina33 on May 9, 2004, at 16:32:16
For one reason or another, people abandon me. Yes it does come from parental issues that I completely understand after 2 years of therapy. It still happens. This time from a man who is leaving me because he did a mistake and is saying "I desreve better" because he has low self esteem and labels himself when he does wrong. HE is the "perfect" one for ME and expressed the same about me. I gave him green light to return and he did. But he didn't mention a word of "sorry" for abandoning me although he knows it's a BIG FAT NO NO to do with me and knows my history and pain from this issue.
Now, am I causing myself pain by having "certain" expectation of hearing "sorry"? Or is it my Ego? I'm 33 with a looooong history of really REALLY harsh circumstances. When will God cut me a break and I get to live life like other people who get love but they take it for granted?!! My gilfriends speak their mind and don't lose their men. In fact, they are botchy and insulting to their men but the guys stay. I am a person afraid to ask for anything lest people walk away.
Please HEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP. The pain is unbearable that I wonder if I am a soul destined to live tormented and I beg God for death everyday because I am NOT suicidal like my mom.
poster:Tina33
thread:345132
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040507/msgs/345132.html