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Re: how do you guys meet healthy people?

Posted by bookgurl99 on March 27, 2004, at 7:53:41

In reply to Re: how do you guys meet healthy people? » noa, posted by octopusprime on March 26, 2004, at 19:19:54


> i don't know what it is. i seem to inexplicably draw problems out of people. i can see hurt where it has been buried. and it's this understanding, even if it is unspoken, that bonds.

Wow -- the phrase about seeing the buried hurt is perfect. I have similar experiences. But maybe it's time for me to realize that I don't need to help those people.

Question -- did you have a sick parent or sick people around you in childhood? my mother was sick a lot, and my parents expected me to take care of her in ways that may not have been age-appropriate. For example, I was giving her medicinal shots that she couldn't bear to give herself when I was 9.

Around the same age, I was the one the family turned to to determine if my cousin's fall from a bike had resulted in a broken bone in her hand or if it would heal on its own. (BTW, I did say it was broken -- and correctly said where the break was, inches away from the pain.) I now realize how absurd it is to ask a 10 year old to do that.

I wonder if I learned to relate to people so much in that way as a result. Instead of as equals, as one person taking care of another somehow.

But the thing is, I -want- equal relationships.


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