Posted by geri122 on March 24, 2004, at 18:15:52
In reply to Re: Desicions, posted by LynneDa on February 17, 2004, at 13:34:20
It has been a very long time since i last wrote. For a while things were acually looking up, but then life made its turn. I lost control of myself. I spent the night at a friends house and well we went out, to a party. We started to drink and all of my problems seemed to disappear. I didn't have to think about my life and how horrible it was. I liked it. That was about 3 months ago, I've been doing the same since. I thought that my life was hell before, but ever since i made the decision to try to drown my problems away, everything just seemed to get worse. I have lost all my friends, but the worst part of it is i have disappointed my sister. The other night i told her i love you and good night and she couldn't say it back. I cryed. It hurt me soo much. I just wanted everything to be ok in my life. I mean i tried almost everything else. I'm really alone now. Everything is soo wrong. I mean, i'm done. i look aroung and see what it is doing to my life. I really am done. I told that to a friend and she didn't believe. This is the same friend that i use to tell everything. She was always there for me and now during a time that i need her most she leaves me. Im dying inside. I really am. I don't know what to do. And the sad thing i really don't care. I have gotten to that point were i do not care. Im sorry that i am all of a sudden telling you guys this, but i need to tell someone this. I need to!
Here, this is something i wrote about my life:
They turned their backs,
And walked away.
They leave me here,
Alone to stray.
I lost all hope of what i had,
My life has gone from good to bad.
They thought they knew about my life,
My back was stabbed with a knife.
I live in fear from all the rest,
I hide behind what's not the best.
Afraid of what could really be,
Somthing worth while for me.
They musy be perfect as could be,
Because now they all seem to judge me.
That one decision that i made,
What I'd do to make a trade.
I'm forced to walk the world in shame,
Now whose the one that i should blame?
THey turned their backs,
And walked away.
They leave me here,
Alone to stray.
They say their worried, that's their excuse,
Then why can't we make a truse?
THey run their mouths about my life,
Again, there goes another knife.
"Friends Forever" we use to say,
Why doesn't that mean something today?
poster:geri122
thread:284151
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040324/msgs/327874.html