Posted by Racer on December 29, 2003, at 18:50:53
In reply to Ex called my parents., posted by kara lynne on December 29, 2003, at 1:25:44
If it helps any, I used to think I was a carrier for happy marriages: about six months after I broke up with a boyfriend, he'd be blissfully married to a wonderful woman. It might have been funny, except that it made me feel as if there was something so wrong with me that I caused all these wonderful men who were so capable of happy relationships to fall into Relationship Hell. Happens once, you shrug it off. Second time, maybe it's a little more difficult. By the third time, you see a pattern forming...
Guess what? You already said this, so I'm just repeating it for you: it's really easy to SAY the right thing, but it takes a lot more to DO ANYTHING. Your ex has done something that doesn't take much effort, raises his personal stock, and hurts you. All with only a telephone call.
Now it's your turn to do something. You're going to look at what he did, look at how much insight you've developed to see exactly what it is he's done, you're going to take a deep breath and then you're going to remind yourself that you don't want to be like that. You want to be healthy and happy, which means that you're going to do those things that require energy and don't hurt yourself or others.
From the sound of your post, there are some drug issues in your/his past? I'd also like to point out to you that hurting other people can be kinda like a drug for some people. Tell yourself that his new body, which he claims is drug free, is actually churning with his new drug: gratuitous cruelty. Aren't you glad you're not strung out on that?
Good luck.
poster:Racer
thread:294220
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031229/msgs/294444.html