Posted by octopusprime on December 10, 2003, at 21:28:18
In reply to My Life Sucks :-(, posted by Susan J on December 10, 2003, at 9:05:46
hi susan
i see you've joined us on the journey to the angry experience. your experience is quite different than fallsfall. while you are indeed angry, when i read your angry list i noticed that many of your points concerned feeling powerless about affecting change in your own life. suffering occurs because you are powerless over other people and nature's course of things.
it's very sad that your dog is sick and that your brother's family has broken up. anger is a stage of grief. now i'm no grief expert (even though i dish it out pretty good - harhar). however, in situations like these, it might help you to read a book on grieving and understanding what to expect. it's part of a process. it's not fair. it's not right. life sucks. but you can take control of how you grieve your losses (and your family's losses), learning how is a step towards empowering yourself.
now work. work. work! bah. i'm no help here - i have very little emotionally invested in my job, so people can generally screw me over at work and it just pretty much rolls off me. however, if you *are* emotionally invested in your job, and you find that you can't affect change in your current place in the organization, maybe it is time for a new job. seriously. it's a sign of disrespect to you if you are angry, have calmly and constructively voiced your concerns, and have got nowhere fast. that's a key indicator of "time to move on".
you're angry at yourself: for the weight, for caring about the behviour about other people, for being depressed. it says a lot about your self-image, that you are so critical of your own thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. again, learning to change your own self-image is empowering, a therapist can hook you up with the tools.
finally: men. ultimately frustrating! but if you are angry that you are emailing him frequently, yet not getting anywhere, maybe it is time to reduce contact? develop other interests. you can't force people to feel what you feel. it sucks, not fair, blech. but, identifying what you want from an encounter, and identifying the steps that you can take when the encounter doesn't go the way you want, is empowering.
so the long and rambly message i have is about empowerment. anger can be empowering if we harness it for use in productive ways! fight the power! burn our bras! i'm feeling empowered!
poster:octopusprime
thread:288315
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031207/msgs/288596.html