Posted by Adia on October 1, 2003, at 11:46:02
In reply to It's my birthday and I'll cry if I want to..., posted by Penny on October 1, 2003, at 9:57:43
Penny,
we've never talked before...
but I wanted to wish you Happy Birthday..
I don't like birthdays, or holidays..even weekends...because I hate to have to smile or pretend everything's fine when inside I may be crying or I lack energy to do anything..
But it's nice to feel loved or to feel people care about you...in the past few years I've tried to celebrate my birthday in a different way..
Sometimes I just go out for a coffee with a friend and I have a heart-to-heart talk and I even let myself cry and be held for a little while...or sometimes I take my little niece somewhere nice -i love being around children and it helps me feel a little heart smile...I shop around and buy something I want, sometimes a teddy bear :o) or I go to a big bookstore and buy books...
I try to do something nice for myself...at least one little thing.
I guess we all need to feel loved and being reminded that we are loved and that someone is with us.
For me a heartfelt hug is the most special gift.
Just wanted to wish you well and send you my support, and I hope you can do something nice for yourself today...
Even if you want to go to bed and watch movies and cry ...that's okay. Just do what you feel and want...I hate to think back of what i have or haven't accomplished because I end up feeling so depressed...and I try not to think of what other people do or how they celebrate. I prefer to do what I feel in my heart. hope you can do the same...
I am 27 too... ;o)
just thinking of you and sending you best wishes,
Adia.> Okay, so that's not exactly the lyrics of the song, but it's how I feel today. Only one of my coworkers even knows today is my birthday, and we are supposed to go to lunch (her birthday was last week, so it will be a joint 'celebration'), but I haven't seen her today. My parents called, which is good, but no other birthday wishes, minus my therapist yesterday.
>
> Tonight I will go home and probably go to sleep. That seems to be all I have the energy for these days. No closer to being settled in my new apartment, and, while I'm glad to be free of the stressful roommate situation, I'm still struggling to keep my head above water.
>
> I hate birthdays. Or, should I say, I hate my birthday. And if I say that, all I hear is "but you're so young!!!" Yes - I'm 27 today. I'm still fairly young. Which makes the fact that I'm so depressed that much more depressing. B/c it makes one ask, what exactly do I have depressed about?
>
> I won't go there right now.
>
> I wish I was home in bed instead of at work. I'm tired...
>
> I apologize for the pity party I'm having with myself.
>
> P
poster:Adia
thread:264686
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030913/msgs/264713.html