Posted by noa on April 6, 2003, at 19:21:15
I didn't get out again today. Beautiful day, but couldn't get moving. But I did do a bit of cleaning. Each time I have an episode of cleaning behavior, it only makes a dent. And each time, I am bewildered at how I let it all get so much worse than the last time I had a cleaning spurt. What is wrong with me that I allow myself to live like this.
Really, I let things go long and filthy. This time, I hadn't touched the dishes in the sink for months! Months I tell you, Months! I don't know what possessed me to actually do something about it yesterday, but I did. I ended up throwing away some moldy mugs and all the flatware!! This isn't the first time I've done that, either. But I did wash the pots out. I soaked them in bleach cleanser first and then scrubbed them. Had to do this in the tub, though, because I only have cold water in the kitchen sink. Another long story. Have to actually get my diswasher installed there.
Last year, when I bought this place, I had the kitchen gutted and put in all new cabinets, sink, appliances, etc. Knocked down a wall or two, new floors, etc. etc. But after all was done and paid up (after holding out the last payment for some other major errors to be fixed), I had the appliances delivered and lo and behold! The dishwasher doesn't fit! Yep, instead of making the 18" cut-out (as all the manufacturer's specs indicate--I checked on line), the contractor made the cut out space only 17 and a half inches!! Who would ever think that a contractor would not make the space the right size!!?? I tried to get him to come back to fix it but he refused, and I decided not to pursue any legal action. So I had someone else (boyfriend of an ex-neighbor) come and look at the problem and to fix it is rather involved because the cabinet wall is embedded with the corian counters,etc, etc. But he said he thinks he might be able to fix it but it wouldn't be a great solution, just adequate.
Anyway, in the meantime, I had the plumbers put in the new disposal and the sink. Knowing that I had a diswhasher planned, they popped out the hole where the dishwasher will connect to drain to the disposal. And, the lead for the hot water to the diswhasher was installed too. So, in order to not have hot water pour out all over the place, I had to turn off the hot water. I also have to keep a bucket under the disposal for overflow if too much water goes down the drain at once.
So, you see--not so conducive to pleasant dish washing, is it?
I need to get the work done. I also need lights and a bunch of other stuff that I ran out of money for! But it has been 10 months already and I'm still living like the trucks just dropped me off here.
Oh, yeah, and I still haven't gotten the washing machine fixed.
Has anyone ever heard the Woody Allen night club monologue about "Mechanical Objects"?
So, with the image of Coral, my inspiration, on my shoulder, cheering me on, I got a bit done today. Finished the dishes and cleaning the sink. Then, I cleared off the cook top surface of the range and cleaned that. Then I even cleaned the oven! It is new and only used a few times, but once when I was baking a sweet potato, it dripped all over the bottom and I never wiped it up so it became encrusted there in a big puddle of burnt sweet potato juice. So, today, I tried out the "auto-clean" function and it worked, not perfectly, but pretty darn good. Then I just wiped away the ashes that were left.
I even put away the pots that I washed. Can you believe it?
Why is all of this so hard for me? Hey, now I'm sounding like one of the characters in The Hours!! Seriously, things that I know aren't difficult, and weren't always so difficult for me, are really hard now. Even though I am not really depressed any more (except maybe past few days in my work-related funk).
I have piles, no not exactly piles, but mounds of papers and other debris everywhere, all mixed together. I need to sort through them and get the papers I need for taxes. I know how to organize, but I can't seem to be able to do it. I come home and drop stuff on the first surface available. And then the mess intensifies.
And it isn't just mess--it's dirt and filth, too. Yuck!!
Will I ever get a handle on this?
poster:noa
thread:216795
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030401/msgs/216795.html