Posted by rayww on February 24, 2003, at 14:58:42
In reply to Bpd: must I always be so embarrased?, posted by elbee on February 22, 2003, at 22:48:16
Right before I was diagnosed Bipolar, I thought most of my ideas were fairly good and normal. I went to some business seminars to do with developing personal skills needed to be outgoing and assertive, overcoming fear, how to master small talk, etc, stepping outside the box, and stuff. Well, I got motivated and did I ever step outside the box. Instead of trying to subdue and control my "swinging", I let it fly and took it as far as it would go. Bad move.
After being diagnosed I became embarrassed for all my previous actions, thinking my whole life had just been invalidated. I tried to lock my ideas inside a box, and I stopped writing.
I have now decided that's not the way to go either. With the understanding I have gained since being diagnosed, and reading on PB, I am ready again to go back to the training. I find it very helpful to listen to motivational speakers and tapes. It is also helpful to walk, not necessarily for aerobics, but slowly to look around and think and clear your head.
You can learn how to change the tape in your head that is playing to your embarrassment. Learn to take risk and extend yourself a little more. I think we all get embarrassed when we take a risk. Just writing to you here makes me feel embarrassed because I don't know if this is a good idea or if I'm swinging out of control again with a bad idea. That's a risk with bipolar, one that we all have to learn to live with.
poster:rayww
thread:202955
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030223/msgs/203399.html