Posted by wendy b. on April 11, 2002, at 17:10:30
In reply to going vegetarian for sar, posted by Krazy Kat on April 10, 2002, at 10:43:09
I really respect you for doing this, K.
I know somehow Sar will feel you honoring her every day by not participating in a practice she abhorred. I wish I had the discipline (comes from disciple).
I tell you what I did: I lit 3 large Goya candles, the kitschy kind Sar would have loved, cuz they only cost $1.49, cuz they are yellow, blue and red, with pictures of saints, assorted Virgins, and Jesuses on them, and messages on the back, prayers, in both Spanish and English. From the Goya section of the grocery store of course...
Anyway, I lit them, crossed myself, and now walk by them and say little prayers, keep them lit even when we are out of the house (they can't hurt anything, they're long tall glass cylinders with wax in them). They stay lit for an incredibly long time. When I came home last night, the saints' faces were glowing...
One is Santa Barbara, you pray to her to keep enemies away ('those wicked and miserable beings who wish to interrupt my Christian life'). I think of those as bad thoughts as well, enemy phantoms in my head. I guess I identified with Sar, she had a lot of those enemy thoughts, and so do I...
The next is Our Lady of Fatima, the Virgin, 'I offer you my soul with all its sorrows and joys,' it's a petition to the Lady to offer my soul to Jesus Christ, so that he will grant a favor, and god, sir, if I could ask a favor, it would be that Sar would know, wherever she is, how much we all loved her, tell her we miss her, and grant her some serenity, if you could please...
Last we have La Virgen de la Caridad del Cobre, Our Lady of Charity... 'Holy Lady of Charity,' it says, simply, 'I humbly and fervently ask that my prayers be heard and answered...' But you know what I want, more than anything, is for us to wind the clock back to a week or so ago, when she was still alive, and freeze us there, or at least give us another chance to make sure Sar knew how we felt about her... Or how about: just keep her alive? And I know that can't happen. And I was baptized Catholic, but I'm no Christian, and I can still pray for something.
We can't go back, I can't stop wishing we could, just a little prayer, just a little magic, that's all we need...
Love you, KK,
Wendy
> i've decided to go back to a vegetarian diet for at least a while (who knows, maybe it will last forever this time) in honor of sar. i remember one thread where we "argued" about wearing leather shoes yet being a vegetarian. both of us wore leather shoes, birkies for sar, and yet she was a strong animal rights activist and i had been in and out of vegetarianism all my life.
>
> as i've gotten older (i'm only 31, but i feel 61), i have come to realize that you don't have to adhere to every single rule to still be doing some good. sar still had that firey approach to a cause she loved, and that was both frustrating and exhilarating to me.
>
> i'll think of her whenever i have spaghetti, whenever i see birkies.
>
> - k.
poster:wendy b.
thread:21832
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020411/msgs/21905.html