Posted by mist on March 10, 2002, at 16:00:24
In reply to How can I stop being a hermit?, posted by mist on March 6, 2002, at 23:05:39
Thank you for your responses everyone. I enjoyed hearing your thoughts on the matter. I'll keep your ideas and observations in mind as I proceed. The activities suggested sound like they would appeal to me.
I think for me it's largely a matter of convincing myself to be out in the world rather than at home—that the effort is worth it. (Good question, ambrosialdelight.) I'm sure this has to do at least in part with the fact that I'm still somewhat depressed. But I'm feeling slightly more motivated now than usual so maybe I'll will make it to a discussion group or class sometime this year. :)
Talking to people I see in my regular routine might be harder because I'm shy and can't always relax enough to have casual conversations in public places, although I would love to be able to do that.
I have made friends at work before but while the people at my current job are generally nice it doesn't seem to be a good source for that.
One of the problems with my old friends is that they've tended to be people who talk a lot about themselves but aren't good listeners, don't seem to understand me very well, and are more judgmental than supportive. I have given them a lot of focused attention in conversations, and support, but for the most part they haven't reciprocated. I put up with that before because I thought it was healthier to try to maintain friendships than to isolate myself but now I'm just sick of it. I'd rather be alone than with people who can't be real friends to me.
poster:mist
thread:19438
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020305/msgs/19576.html