Posted by Anna Laura on December 15, 2001, at 2:36:15
In reply to Depressed Trust, posted by Drewsprt23 on December 14, 2001, at 10:37:38
> Hello Me and my girlfriend have been going out for a year and 6
> months. I lied to her, which were small white lies.
> I lied to her when we first went out about me being a life
> guard another being a gucci model, and the fact of her feeling
> betrayed of her trust. Like a month ago a girl called and i told
> her it was someone else. But it has been a month things have
> been good and i do not want to lie to her ever again. I want to
> be open with her. I love her to death. She still feels i am
> capable of lieing.What can I do to reassure her I wont lie again?
> What can I do? Cause I dont want to lose her.
>
> Depressed Drew
May be you should ask yourself why did you have to lie to her in the first place.
I also used to lie in my teen-age years: i was scared people might find out what lied beneath the mask in the long run. Don't do that. It's definetely not a good idea, gets you very troubled and anxious and you'll eventually doubt about your own real identity strength. Please be careful: It's an addictive habit.
As far as regaining your girlfriend's trust, i suggest you to tell her exactly why you had to lie to her and tell her about your fears and lack of selfconfidence. Even if she may reject you, you won't be sorry since you'llbe certain you had the guts to open up and tell her the truth.
I think you should accept yourself for what you are: that doesn't necessarily imply you're not a valuable and fascinating person. You should have the courage to look what's beneath the mask with love and self-respect. It's not that easy , i know. You may not like what you see at first, but believe me, you'll like in the long run and you won't regret it since being ourselves and love it it's a much higher pleasure then the short-lived gratification of playing with fake identies.
i'm aware it's very difficult, you may want to take one step at a time.
poster:Anna Laura
thread:15531
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011207/msgs/15581.html