Posted by Dr. Bob on December 5, 2001, at 20:52:52
In reply to big mess (my life) « KB, posted by Dr. Bob on December 5, 2001, at 20:49:20
[Posted by AnneL on December 5, 2001, at 0:01:33]
> Dear KB,
>
> I'am so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Not to mention being broke, new job with no time off, big work commitments, cats to feed, medicines to buy, house to repair. . . It sounds awfully difficult right now.
>
> I can totally rel ate to feeling like you just can't take one more day of dealing with all you have to deal with. There was a time not in the too distant past when I really thought that this was the end of the line for me. The only thing that made any difference whatsoev er (besides being on medication) were the few people in my life who helped me stand when I could barely walk.
>
> First things first: food to eat (my cats probably would think they had died and gone to heaven if I gave them scrambled eggs!), shelter you have (although I admit carrying water upstairs is a pain in the you know where- but this is temporary). Second: A small loan from a good friend (after all I'am willing to bet that you have done it for others sometime in your life)
> to get your meds (and some cat food and maybe a little something for their master, oh, wait I forgot, you are the slave, they are the master!) Third: a good friend to make you laugh and help you straighten out that checkbook.
>
> It will all work out, somehow, one day at a time.
> :) AnneL
[Posted by akc on December 5, 2001, at 10:22:17]> I just want you to know that I understand where you are at. Life sure can suck.
>
> akc
[Posted by leonard60 on December 5, 2001, at 10:42:34]> I would suggest that you stop feeling so sorry for your self. And try an worry about the things you do have control of like seeing about get you?re med and getting an ID so you can see your grandmother. Your other alternative is to wallow around in your self pity and let things get worse for you. Life can really suck for everyone some time and the only thing you can do is to try and change the things you have control of.
[Posted by akc on December 5, 2001, at 10:58:36]> Telling someone to quit feeling sorry for themselves is just about as useful as telling me to quit feeling the pain in my knee. Sometimes based on the circumstances in our lives and the medical condition we are in, what seems to be fruitless, wasteful self-pity to you, is a serious medical condition. I haven't seen anyone in KB's situation or mine who wouldn't give anything to be able to just snap out of it -- to be able to pull ourselves up by the bootstraps -- to be able to do all the right things, right now. While what you say is true about working on those things we have control of, your tone in this post is hurtful. Gentleness is a better approach than shame.
>
> akc
[Posted by leonard60 on December 5, 2001, at 15:20:03]> What I meant was do something about your situation and maybe things will not seem so bad. I have been through very bad time of depression and other physiological problems
> And am on meds and therapy for then now. I can not think of any time that it has helped me to sit around and complain. Shame and gilt are not what I am trying to give just some useful advice. Sometime things you don?t want to hear are what you might really need to here.
poster:Dr. Bob
thread:15009
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011130/msgs/15010.html