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Still Hurting

Posted by akc on November 30, 2001, at 17:14:59

I'm just going crazy -- I'm getting work done -- barely. I had to get so many hours billed to day (last day of the month and all). So I could look the partner responsible for my review in the face on Monday and ask for a certain amount of money next year. I am going to get a cut in pay, but I am trying to minimize it. Don't worry -- I'm a lawyer and I know my rights under ADA and FMLA -- I want the cut -- I don't want to keep up with the Jones anymore. I am unable to do so, and they don't have to pay you if you are unable to do the job. But I am rambling.

I still hate my life. I wonder if I always will. I am really tired. I know, I have said that in how many posts in the past 24 hours? I'm scared to go home -- I am certain I am going to cut tonight. A part of me has made that decision. I has been almost 9 months. I had done so well. But I just can't stand how I am feeling. Yes, it is temporary -- but better temporary than not at all. I gotta do something. I cannot stand what I am feeling. They say you cannot explode -- I think I might.

Oh, the other thing I could do is take my dog's medicine -- I give her xanax for thunderstorms -- that would calm me down. I am tempted. What a hoot -- stealing from my dog. I would rather cut. Sad choices.

akc


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poster:akc thread:14631
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011130/msgs/14631.html