Posted by paxvox on September 5, 2001, at 7:45:35
In reply to Re: Under-reaction, posted by susan C on September 4, 2001, at 13:50:00
I didn't say it was EASY, Susan, just efficacious.
I guess the best parallel I can think of is "turn the other cheek" as many times as necessary. Perhaps it works along the same theory of the bully principle i.e. when you ignore the taunts of a bully, they soon tire of bullying you because they don't get the reaction they need for their own self-affirmation. Same would apply to a teenager doing something like getting her tongue pierced because she knows it would piss daddy off. Had I hit the roof (first reaction) she would have succeeded, however, I said "hey, what other colors do those come in? And make sure you wash it out right to avoid infection." I was REALLY thinking, "you idiot"! I guess there is a point where one must draw a line (though Ghandi would probably say there is no limit). I guess when "self" becomes less important because of altruistic reasons, there is some reward. Sort of like giving a gift, but giving it anonymously. If your reason for giving was to receive "praise" from the recipient, the motive was not pure. Does that make any sense?PAX
poster:paxvox
thread:10777
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010901/msgs/10825.html