Posted by Cam W. on August 3, 2001, at 10:32:30
In reply to Re: Redirected: Cam Come Back!, posted by Gracie2 on August 3, 2001, at 3:00:40
Gracie - I am having a hard time with all the shit surrounding issues of grief. The best advice I get is, "Time will heal". That really doesn't help me keep a job or keep me from doing stupid things. The court cases, lawyers, bosses, confusion, aggravation, self-doubt, anger, insecurity, lost feeling, what-ifs, words unsaid, things undone, those hurting around me, helplessness, futility, what next, why bother....
I find that I have trouble opening up to psychotherapists (probably haven't found the right one) or even good friends. I am not a religious person in any sense of the word; nor will I ever be. I have trouble holding onto false hope. My dreams are shattered. I also have guilt because I cannot "buck-up" and be there for my wife and 6 year-old (who are also hurting, and there is nothing I can do to "fix it".)
There is no joy in Muddville.
Sincerely, Cam.
poster:Cam W.
thread:8530
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010731/msgs/8643.html