Posted by ShelliR on April 23, 2001, at 22:58:02
In reply to ShelliR- your opinion?, posted by judy1 on April 22, 2001, at 14:50:15
> Shelli,
> I get the impression that you understand a great deal of what i'm going through, and would greatly appreciate your input. Because I am pregnant I am just taking klonopin right now and am being told I need to step up therapy. I just posted that i'm dissociating now (actually quite a bit) but it helps. When I go to my therp, no matter how slow she goes and even my shrink- i really think i self-injure more. Does this make sense? Don't you think it's better to pull back for me right now? Thanks, judyHi Judy. I can't believe you are off all drugs but klonopin. That's incredibly great, that you have been able to do this.
I think you need to figure out why you si after therapy.
I'll tell you what happens to me and maybe you can relate ( if not it's okay). I think therapy both helps me deal with life in a more mature way through the cognitive work I've done, but also causes part of me emotionally to regress. My worst nights are the evenings after therapy, particularly after my double session. For me it has to do with attachment, and my perception that the attachment is gone after I leave. That is a time that I will often want to si (although I generally don't) and I'm more likely to page my therapist.
Then by the next day I hurt much less and I am not bent out of shape--so I think for me the attachment triggers the part of me that was "a motherless child" , who still wants to be taken care of at the deepest level. It's hard for me to believe I'm still working on that.
I don't know if that has anything to do with what you feel.
I really can't advise you. You need to use your own judgment and also if you trust your therapist and pdoc, you need to evaluate why they want you to step up therapy.
Having a baby is not going to stop those feelings in you that cause you to dissociate and to si. Maybe your therpist wants you to step up therapy so that at least some of these feelings can possibly be worked through before your baby is born. Your baby's going to need as much of you as possible, both physically and emotionally. So maybe that would be a better time to pull back and this is a better time to work on yourself, even if things feel exacerbated.
I hope I didn't confuse you. You obviously need to focus on the conflict between stepping up and pulling back with your therp.
Shelli
poster:ShelliR
thread:5763
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010417/msgs/5780.html