Posted by Cary on April 23, 2001, at 4:09:59
In reply to Re: Coping with a relationship during depression, posted by Gracie2 on April 22, 2001, at 22:01:21
Many thanks for replying, Gracie. You're right, it is the uncertainty. But when I'm happy and we're together I love her intensely, when we're apart and especially now I've lapsed into another period of depression, I start doubting everything, start feeling numb. She's really been so kind and understanding this last week, yet I still try to push her away. I've thought of the breathing room idea, even tentatively suggested it but she's really as insecure as I am in many ways, and I don't think she'd be able to cope with it.
It's the uncertainty - but how can I be certain of *anything* when I'm feeling like this, when everything looks black and hopeless and confusing? It's just one more thing for the depression to chew up and spit out.
Cary> Cary-
> I assume you're feeling guilty because your feelings are not as strong as hers, and you are telling this person that you love her when you're not sure that you do.
> I hope you discuss your feelings with your friend. Even if it hurts her, it is much kinder than ending the relationship without letting her know what the real problem is. Please be honest, let her know that she is special to you but that you are feeling unable to deal with an intense
> relationship right now. She may be willing to back off and give you some breathing room until
> you're feeling better...which will be a better time for you to decide whether you want to continue the relationship.
> -Gracie
poster:Cary
thread:5761
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010417/msgs/5769.html