Posted by Noa on April 10, 2001, at 17:16:19
In reply to Re: ADAM, WOW, I will strongly consider that!, posted by Dubya on April 8, 2001, at 21:24:12
Great topic.
I think as adults we have somewhat better control over our personal boundaries and can therefore protect ourselves from bullies using any of a number of strategies.
But the fact is that bullies do exist, and we may encounter them from time to time. One way to protect ourselves is to fight. One example of fighting is through the legal system; as maligned as attorneys and contingency-based lawsuits might be in the media today, they help to level the playing field and give the victim of bullies a chance to make things right. Another option is to walk away---this is often a very good option, and takes a lot of strength.
But it is equally important to not internalize the bullying psychologically, which some of us do to ourselves, or to absorb the agressive energy from the bully and then pass it on to others, which can be an easy trap to fall into. So, if we walk away from a bully situation, we need to have a way to deal with the hurt and agressive energy, to be conscious of how we process this.
In general, I think it is important to be in touch with what power we do have to protect our selves and our boundaries, and with our personal power, so that we are ready to cope if encountering bullies. But also to be realistic in knowing that we cannot control the behavior of others, and there is some rotten behavior out there in the world.
poster:Noa
thread:5366
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010404/msgs/5600.html