Posted by shar on January 5, 2001, at 9:54:47
In reply to Re: lost in the world, posted by S. Howard on January 4, 2001, at 17:21:49
Kelly,
I haven't posted in a while either and am glad to see you still here.
I think one reason you might feel alone is that there are lots of people around, but they are all hassling you in one way or another. To feel less alone, to be able to receive something that does your heart good, the words you let in have to be caring.
I have always had a lot of suicidal ideation, but have developed my own personal taboos about it, and will not put myself in harm's way or hurt myself (but it is SO HARD not to). I'm glad that you were strong enough to resist the pills (you notice I did not say "too afraid" to resist). You have a core of strength - not fear - that keeps you moving through molasses days and desperation.
It is no easy job. I have a lot of admiration for you, and I don't want you to harm yourself at all. In fact, I would feel like it would be a shame and a waste to lose you. I am wondering if you could keep hanging on a while longer, and keep after doing your meds (try 'em all if you have to), and get rid of any pills you aren't taking anymore, and post again very soon and let us know how you are.
I will be looking out for a post from you. Take care of you,
Shar
poster:shar
thread:3700
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010105/msgs/3711.html