Posted by Noa on November 21, 2000, at 15:16:32
OK, so it is just about here. Here is my deal:
For some reason, my family, whom I LIKE to spend holidays with, never gets its act together for Thanksgiving, or if it does, it does so at the very last minute.
This year, I decided not to wait around waiting to be invited. I wish I could be the one doing the inviting but I am not in a place to do that right now. In past years, I have waited anxiously to be invited, feeling hurt. At times, I have taken the initiative to call to ask to be invited. I don't like doing that, either.
This year, I decided to do something completely different.
Coincidentally, a good friend made the decision to not go to her abusive family for holidays this year.
So, we decided to do something different. We are going out to dinner and then to a show.
In the morning, if I can get myself up and out, I would like to do some volunteer work, maybe visiting kids in the hospital.
And, if my family (the local contingent) decides to call tonight or tomorrow night to invite me, well, too late. Although this isn't the primary motivation for this, I must admit, I am enjoying the idea of telling them I already have other plans.
Mostly, I feel good about being proactive and making plans, doing something good for myself, not waiting around passively and feeling hurt.
I am still a bit pissed off about how this works in my family, but I am not feeling hurt like I usually do.
poster:Noa
thread:3059
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20001117/msgs/3059.html