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Re: No one else leaves, please. » ClearSkies

Posted by Tamar on June 8, 2006, at 19:11:06

In reply to Re: No one else leaves, please. » curtm, posted by ClearSkies on June 8, 2006, at 6:30:53

> I have come to accept that this place just can't be right for everyone.

See, that's where I have trouble. I think that if I were to accept that this place can't be right for everyone I'd be condoning the exclusion that can happen here. (That's just how *I* feel; it's not a criticism of your acceptance of the status quo.)

I think about the idea that Babble isn't right for everyone, and it seems the idea entails a kind of inevitability that some people will incur block after block after block and finally leave in great pain. And what have they gained? I worry that perhaps all they gain is much hurt and a reinforcement of the idea that they don't belong.

I can hardly bear seeing some of the pain people feel when they're blocked; pain that is still evident when they return. I'm not saying blocking is inherently a bad idea; I think it's probably necessary sometimes. But I feel a growing sense of being responsible as a community for others who are part of Babble, and I’m becoming increasingly uneasy with the blocks and with the impossibility of offering comfort to blocked posters (unless someone happens to know their email address). And I think it’s particularly hard when people return from blocks because they’re often angry and hurt and might need to be able to talk about that in the community, but if they’re not careful they risk another block and more pain.

I’m not convinced from what I’ve seen here that most people feel they’ve learned anything useful from blocks (though maybe some do). And I’ve always believed in rehabilitation rather than in punishment. So if this place isn’t for everyone, perhaps we’re not doing enough as a community to make sure everyone really can be part of Babble.

I dunno. I’m just uneasy. And I’m posting here instead of Admin because I’m particularly interested in how we relate to each other in the Babble community, and whether we can take communal responsibility for anything. If this place isn’t for everyone, what do we do for the people who very much want to be part of it, but who have difficulties remaining within the guidelines? I guess I just can’t accept that they don’t belong here. I wonder if we could do more to help them participate fully.

Sigh. Lots of questions and no answers.



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poster:Tamar thread:654215
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060511/msgs/654608.html