Posted by Larry Hoover on May 23, 2006, at 16:02:50
In reply to The root problem » Larry Hoover, posted by Declan on May 23, 2006, at 14:54:18
> Well, let's say:
>
> "If you had not monopolised the TV, I would not have burnt the toast."
>
> "I would not have monopolised the TV, if you had not burnt the toast yesterday."
>
> This sounds a bit like politics. (I have "Blowback" in mind.)
>
> Like a cycle of revenge and mistrust?You have made it overt. Almost always, this is covert. Hidden. Simmering below the surface.
He left the lid off the toothpaste again! Simmersimmersimmer. She maxed out the credit card! Simmersimmersimmer.
I think everybody is passive-aggressive, to some degree. Dragging it out into the open, where it can be looked at in the bright light of day, that is the challenge.
Yes, politics is passive-aggressive. And a couple of other things, too.
The thing is making the link between the acting-out behaviour, and the REAL trigger. That is the tough part. Even if you know you're the one doing it, it isn't necessarily easy to find the underlying stimulus(i).
Lar
poster:Larry Hoover
thread:647224
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060511/msgs/647393.html