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my relationship, my life...edge of cliff feeling..

Posted by alesta on May 4, 2006, at 12:20:56

hey y'all..

i didn't sleep a wink last night so this post may have a strange feel to it...nevermind that please

i realized yesterday that i no longer love my bf..i found out something else horrible that he did yesterday (no he didn't sleep with anyone) and i am so *done*. but he doesn't know that yet...

he is still going to go in the military (turns out he lied to me concerning the reason why he cannot go in yet--turns out the b*stard failed a piss test! the document somehow ended up in my bag...strange (every time he does something wrong i end up accidentally discovering it lol..synchronicity perhaps...anyway, he lied, again!! (he'd told me some really warply worded story about needing more college credits and too many waivers or some b**sh*t.)

anyways, i am sad about last night, but not *too* sad. he keeps saying he wants me to marry him before he goes in the military...no way. i need to become strong in several different facets so i can leave. i didn't sleep at all last night, like i said...i am so stressed out. and i am talking to another guy and not sure where that will lead. i need to stabilize my life....right now i feel like i'm standing on the edge of a cliff. i don't know anymore. i'm scared about a lot of things all of a sudden. even though i don't love my bf, i am scared to live alone...i think. i just don't know. i would go home and get some sleep but he is there and i don't want to deal with him. i feel like i need to talk to someone here. is anyone here?

thank you,:-)
amy


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Psycho-Babble Relationships | Framed

poster:alesta thread:639944
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060220/msgs/639944.html