Posted by SLS on May 21, 2014, at 22:23:47
In reply to Sexualiazation of Therapy.Struggling to confront t, posted by Kate123456 on May 20, 2014, at 8:03:43
I apologize. I wrote this before reading your post closely enough. I was reacting to your list. I was disgusted by it. I now see that you have a great deal of insight into what has happened.
Qustion: What do you NEED to do?
Would you like some suggestions on how to process your emotions so that you can confront him about the past?
In any event, I'll leave below the words that I put together, just in case it reinforces things that you already know.
Spoiler: Don't send that letter.
- Scott
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Gosh. This is very wrong.Have you been keeping a log concurrent with your experiences, or are you working from memory?
Are you in love with this person? Do you want him to act on his suggestive words?
Even if this person turns out to be your life's best love and eternal soulmate, you still should be seeing someone else for counseling. Your current "counselor" is indulging himself in a psychosexual fantasy about you. You know this. Why have you not left him?
What do you need from him that he currently provides you with?
What do you want from him that he has not yet provided you with?
No blame. No judgments. No need to answer.
I suggest to you that you not invest yourself in someone who would prey upon the vulnerabilities of his patients the way he has already mauled you with his sexually abusive language and emotionally manipulative mind games. In my estimation, he is neither a psychotherapist nor a pastor.
At this point, I think you should simply walk away with no explanation. Report him if you believe that is the right thing to do. Protect other women from him. I don't believe that confronting him serves any purpose, and you owe him nothing. He has been taking money from you all the while entertaining himself using you as a psychosexual toy.
This stuff is very easy for me to say. It does not take into consideration the bond that you feel you have with this person and how you have come to rely on him emotionally. You probably feel that he knows you better than anyone else ever has. Sadly, this might be true. Perhaps that is why he has so much power over you such that you have not left him sooner.
He raped you. He kept raping you.
Leave him.
You can do better.
The letter:
If you send that letter, you will demonstrate to him that you want to continue a relationship with him. You would not be cutting him off. You would not be extricating yourself from a malignancy. You would be inviting him to remain in your life.
Of course, if you want him to remain in your life...
Good luck.
- ScottSome see things as they are and ask why.
I dream of things that never were and ask why not.- George Bernard Shaw
poster:SLS
thread:1065836
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20140310/msgs/1065937.html