Posted by baseball55 on March 13, 2014, at 20:59:58
In reply to Re: He's not dying » Dinah Seeks Support, posted by Twinleaf on March 13, 2014, at 20:07:23
I don't mean to be critical Dinah and I understand the frustration and anger and abandonment you feel, but you have to consider that maybe he is physically and mentally unable to deal with patients right now Maybe he just needs to take care of himself right now and limit his interactions to friends and family who will take care of him and make no emotional demands.
You seem so angry and hurt and this is understandable. But ask yourself how you would feel if he were seriously ill or disabled or suffering. Do you want to be the sort of person who attends only to her own feelings and doesn't consider his suffering?
If this happened to me (and I know one day it will and it will be hard and painful), I would try to tell myself that he needs to take care of himself right now and cannot take care of me. I hope I can be this selfless.
The therapeutic relationship is fraught. It's a real relationship, filled with trust and caring and genuine love. But it's not the same as a real personal relationship, because it's one-sided and circumscribed by therapeutic boundaries.
See if you can let go of the anger and hurt and imagine caring for him in his time of need by sending loving-kindness his way.
poster:baseball55
thread:1062006
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20140310/msgs/1062443.html