Posted by deerock on February 23, 2013, at 13:23:37
In reply to Re: long road in psychotherapy, posted by Meatwood_Flack on February 23, 2013, at 12:35:46
> I noticed that the only therapist out of the group you terminated was female and you are now considering terminating another female therapist. Could there be a gender preference at play?
Yes, certainly. My transference towards a man is less volatile and less angry.
It wouldn't be rare, at all. Secondly, unless I read your post wrong it sounds like you may have some trust issues, which are certainly understandable when one has spent years trying to overcome a distressing condition.
> Finally, why are you considering trying to find another therapist? Why do you feel that your current therapist isn't helping you? I think you should be as honest with yourself as possible about any biases you may have (and these aren't always obvious, so dig a little.) Is an MAOI the first medication you've been prescribed? It would be unusual, if so, but not a decision your therapist would have made. Sometimes, therapists and clients don't gel, for lots of reasons.The MAOI is the first med ive been in in many years. Years ago, many meds failed so this doc thought hell why bother with all the failed ones from before, lets go to the big momma.
I think she isnt helping because I am back on meds, suicidal and not leaving my house. I have not been this bad in many years. She says its actually because the therapy is working. I am saying its because she isnt helping me feel contained or hopeful, something about her causes me to allow myself to unravel without a stopping point. She says its not her that is causing that and finding someone else wont solve it. Yet it has never happened with anyone else to this extent.Before terminating again, it might be helpful to think about what is motivating you to consider terminating. Are you and your therapist simply not on the same page or are you, possibly, harboring expectations that no therapist could fulfill?
we are on the same page in the sense that we both understand what i am about. the not on the same page part has to do with how bad i feel and that i think it has to do with something she lacks that i need. i think she lacks something she thinks i do. other t's made me feel more hopeful than she does.
The desire to feel better is very powerful and it can lead to expecting more of a therapist than they are able to provide. Mull it over before making a decision
yes i agree. i am not making any hasty decisions. i mull it over quite a bit. too much. i think in part i am expecting something from her that is out of reach but at the same time, ive had it before from other T's so its not made up. its real. but her argument, the current it, is something like hey, its time to provide it for yourself leaving to find it in someone else will not solve this problem. i think she may be right. and thats why i havent bolted yet. just in case she is.
poster:deerock
thread:1038687
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20120922/msgs/1038719.html