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I saw my p-doc today

Posted by emmanuel98 on December 30, 2010, at 20:25:41

Not for an appointment. I was driving down the street by his office and he was walking up the street. I haven't seen him since after thanksgiving and won't see him until next week. I've been seeing him once a month or more like ever 5 weeks because of the holidays. The last time I saw him, at the end of the session, he turned to his appointment book and said, so shall we make an appointment for two months from now. I was so upset. I said, can I see you next month? So he made an appointment for five weeks away. Five weeks is a long time. I wish I could have seen him today instead of a week from today. He was around. I could have had an appointment today. I cried as I drove home. I can't imagine really ending this, yet I tried ending a year ago and started seeing him every three months for meds, after seeing him every week for five years. Now it's been another year, seeing him once a week for time, then once every two weeks, now once a month and now he is talking about once every two months. I am distraught about this. I didn't realize this until I saw him. I honked my horn and waved but he didn't see me. Or maybe he did and ignored me. I am so fearful of next week, that he will tell me it's time to cut back and end. How will I survive without him? He takes up so much space in my mind. I fall asleep trying to remember what he looks like and wake up realizing I was dreaming of him. But six years! Doesn't this ever end?


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Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:emmanuel98 thread:975322
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20101228/msgs/975322.html