Posted by lingonberry on December 10, 2009, at 3:58:35
In reply to Re: I started a new thread about finding a new T, posted by TherapyGirl on December 8, 2009, at 20:01:06
Hi, TG. I have followed the thread and I really dont know what to say. (But I try anyway. LOL)
Im so sorry about the way your T is handling your termination. She could have made it a lot easier for you. Or could she?
>>And I'm not enjoying how easy she's making it on herself to leave me.>>
>>This is just so alien for her. It couldn't be further away from the way she used to act. It's very, very hard to swallow. Zero response to the voice mail. And that's after the conversation we had after I returned from my 3-week break last summer where I told her how hurtful it was for there to be no response to my messages then. She basically said she didn't know what to say and was trying to give me time. I told her that was not how that works for me -- that my brain will fill in all kinds of reasons for her not responding and that she could at least leave a message for me at the house. She said she didn't think of it, but that was a good idea!>>
Maybe thats not what this is all about; shes making it easy for herself. I cant think that anyone would work in this field without empathy for others and a wish to doing good. I do think shes care about you, a lot. But its obvious that she has issues regarding termination, that she is afraid and dont know how to handle the situation.
She has acting in this way before. Im not saying' she's not responsible for the situation, because she is. Its her job to handle this carefully - its her responsibility to work trough her own issues before she decides to work in this field. But her sudden lack of understanding shows her insufficiency. Maybe she was a very good T, but when it comes to termination and separation shes really of the hook. And unfortunately, you have to pay the price. I wish you have had the opportunity to end a good relationship with a mix feeling of sadness, joy and mutual respect instead of this. And I hope that no aspects of you blame yourselves by thinking if I onlyI think its crucial that you aloud yourself to grieve for the loss, and feel all the anger thats follows with being treating this way. I hope, and believe, in time, you will remember the good thing you shared with her and looking forward to let yourself continue your growth, become the person you was meant to be, together with a new skilful and caring T.
Lingonberry
poster:lingonberry
thread:927957
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20091022/msgs/928711.html