Posted by Dinah on September 13, 2009, at 10:50:17
In reply to attachments, posted by blahblahblah on September 12, 2009, at 16:41:46
No, I wouldn't say schizoid. You identify yourself as overattaching and driving people away in fear of being hurt. Not of being isolated or unaware of caring about others.
In my opinion, physical abuse of the sort you describe means your mother tore up her mother card, and it is perfectly reasonable of you not to attach to her or see her overmuch.
The over-attachment to maternal figures sounds like a perfect thing to work on in therapy. And I suppose I'd think it made sense that unless you stick around and bear the attachment, you won't be able to work through it. Is your therapist female? Is she there for the long haul with you?
I was just archiving some old emails from my therapist, from around the time of Katrina. I cringed to read them, and seriously thought of deleting them entirely. The anxious attachment I had to him is so clear to me now. I'd contact him, and get upset when he didn't get back to me, and write back saying how horrible I was to bother him and could he just assure be xxxx and I'd leave him alone. The tone of total bewilderment in his voice is so obvious to me now. He'd say that he didn't know where this was coming from. That I didn't need to leave him alone. etc. etc.
I see it now so clearly because my attachment to him is so much more secure.
But I'm not entirely sure how that translates to my relationship with people in general. It might. In fact it probably does. I'd have to think on that.
poster:Dinah
thread:916729
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090907/msgs/916862.html