Posted by fleeting flutterby on August 1, 2009, at 11:38:11
In session the other day, I said that I just realized-- when I'm stressed I listen to angry music(I'm not EVER comfortable showing any anger myself) I guess listening to "Metallica" and "Rage Against the Machine", to name a few, let's me feel as though I've expressed my own anger. The therapist I see said that sometimes anger is in front of pain-- just the anger is allowed out, the pain is hidden.
I'm not comfortable with crying or letting anyone know I'm hurt. I, for the most part, don't show much emotions at all. I don't want to need anyone, nor let anyone know how I feel.
I know about suppressed anger resulting in depression---- I've lived with that a long time...... but..... what about when you're angry(even if it's all inside yourself)--Do you think it could be a less vulnerable way to handle emotional pain-- feeling anger instead of sadness? It makes my stomach turn to consider the possibilty that, throughout my childhood, I was severely emotionally hurt. If I can accept that- does that make me weaker? (could I actually be able to be emotionally hurt?.... ugh...) somehow it feels like it would............
and what is it with T., she keeps saying "she's with me".... that I'm not alone in this..... makes me a little uneasy. doesn't she get that I don't need anyone........
flutterby-mandy
poster:fleeting flutterby
thread:909652
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090730/msgs/909652.html