Posted by sharon7 on February 19, 2009, at 7:27:58
In reply to Hair pulling :( Support please, posted by no_rose_garden on February 18, 2009, at 23:24:58
Good morning, rose. (o:
I am sure sorry you are having this struggle.
I'm sorry when you reached out for help (here) in the past you did not get many responses. How courageous of you to try again. Responses to your posts should not be contingent upon how many threads you have or have not replied to. I have worried about the same thing, though, to be honest. Often I feel I have nothing to add, can't relate, or like you, don't want to repeat what's already been said. I think maybe here's the thing. Hopefully people are not only looking for advice from someone who's "been there, done that," but simply to be heard. Just to know someone cared enough to read what you had to say. I read lots of posts I don't comment on (for the reasons we have bothe mentioned,) but perhaps the thing to do is, just to let that person know you read their post, you sympathize, and wish them the best. Even that would go a long way. It would with me anyway. You can even just reply and click the 'no message' thing and give the person a (((((person))))).
SOOOOOO, that's what I'm doing here, rose. I have no experience with hair pulling (I'm not even going to TRY and spell the medical name for it!) lol! I agree with the others who said go online (although you probably have already) and research the condition and what others have done to cope with it. On the surface, it sounds like nerves and stress. I wish I could offer some alternatives to you. I could try. I think your T is right about it being a way you comfort yourself. Isn't it odd how the things we use for comfort are so harmful to us? The opposite of comfort. Go figure? Perhaps you are feeling particularly in need of comfort because of things you are addressing in therapy? Or maybe cuz you aren't seeing your T this week? It could be a combination of things. We are going to need comfort for the rest of our lives. Some of us more than others. It does behoove us to learn less self-destructive means of obtaining comfort for ourselves, and I know that's tough. When our source(s) of comfort is/are external, meaning we rely on another individual for that comfort, when they can't or don't deliver for whatever reason, we have nothing to fall back on except those things we "think" make us feel better (or we wouldn't do them,) but are actually destroying us. I have found this site to be very cathartic. It is still kind of depending on someone else to validate you, though, so still basically an external source of comfort, but even if you are not validated, just writing your feelings down can be therapuetic. AND, while you are typing, makes it kind of hard to pull your hair, just as it prevents me from engaging in some of my own self-destructive behavior that requires the uses of my hands. (o:
I hope you have a good day. I'm glad you shared. I wish you well with this. You can get better. Don't give up. Keep looking for support wherever you can get it. Go to other doctors if you need to and if that's an option. Learn all you can about this condition and what others so afflicted have done to stop. Take care.
Sharon
poster:sharon7
thread:881011
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090214/msgs/881037.html