Posted by Dinah on November 24, 2008, at 21:11:41
In reply to Any advise on male vs female for me as never got a, posted by Phillipa on November 24, 2008, at 20:50:34
Well, I think I generally prefer men for myself. For a number of reasons largely based on my prior experiences in life I'd guess.
That being said, I've known females who I think I could work with. If my neurologist was a therapist I'd have loved her. She was so empathetic, in the sense of being able to grasp instantly what was going on with me. Yet she wasn't particularly mushy about it. And even though she was very pretty and slim, I never picked up the teensiest hint of negative judgment from her.
And of course biofeedback guy was male, and he was *dreadful*. Abrasive, harsh, everything I least would want in a therapist.
I tend to like the whole yin/yang balance to a male/female pair. Even in the absence of sexual interest, there is a different feel to it. Mind you, we switch roles in that often enough.
My therapist says he thinks my problems with women therapists have been that a woman is more likely to push me to change, and less likely to accept me as I am. And that I'd likely get less acceptance for what he considers the "younger" aspects of my presentation. I think that's more or less a variation on what I believe about negative judgments being more likely from women. Although I suppose men can have some pretty negative judgments too, and I reminded my therapist that he once was pretty revolted by my appearance and dress. But now he sees me as me, and really doesn't notice, so it all worked out.
So maybe good fit counts most. But for myself, were I to look for a long term therapist, I think I'd start looking with the men.
poster:Dinah
thread:865097
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081120/msgs/865103.html