Posted by Kath on October 27, 2008, at 19:58:25
In reply to Why would he do it?, posted by JoniS on October 26, 2008, at 19:24:15
> So why would he do this to me, 9:45 at night, livin my life and minding my own business, here I'm going through a divorce and he knows I'm dealing with lonliness and he know that I love him? I've been trying to get the courage to quit therapy, because I think I only go now to see him. I'm not even sure I beleive in the merits of therapy anymore. But I don't quit yet because I figure that I need to talk to someone for a while longer as I'm coming through this awful time. Anyway - his text just revives my fantasy that he does have some feelings for me and that we could some day have a reltionship (ethically after 2 yrs) He has been going through some huge relationship challenges with his wife during the past several months but he doesn't talk about it any more (he only did a little bit before) Why do you suppose he sent me that message? I feel so lonely sometimes and right now is one of those times.
> Joni~ ~ ~I don't know why Joni ((((((you)))). But I do know that in my opinion he most certainly should NOT have. I think it was at the very least, unprofessional & at the very most - cruel.
I hear that you need someone to support you through this difficult time. I agree. I truly hope that you can obtain this help from another source.
What he has done has 'muddied the waters' in my opinion. I don't read a lot of posts on this board, but I've certainly read loud-&-clear how many people are in so much pain from developing romantic feelings for their therapists. Your therapists has gone outside the bounds of what is OKAY. In my opinion he had no right to do this & I would think the safest thing for you to do is to terminate the relationship as soon as possible.
How can you ever relate in the same way again? That'd be my quesiton.You sound like you're ready to go ahead strongly in your life. You deserve to eventually be involved romantically (if you want to) with someone who is there for you as an equal partner. Also, I might add, hopefully it will be someone who is ethical & if they're involved in a profession, that they're responsible & morally accountable to any standards set by that professioin.
I am so sorry this has happened.
I've only read your first post, so have no idea what others have said or where you're at now.
(((((((((((((((((you))))))))))))))
I care about you, Kath
poster:Kath
thread:859395
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081018/msgs/859544.html