Posted by llurpsienoodle on September 15, 2008, at 18:02:29
In reply to should I ask for an extra session?, posted by llurpsienoodle on September 13, 2008, at 11:01:12
I told him about my feelings of worthlessness. We discussed how it was a gross distortion, my feeling like a disgusting person. My inflated superego that comes crashing down on my poor innocent ego.
He asked me to think of three things that are absolutely disgusting about myself. Then we discussed them.
1) I'm unattractive. Well, I don't look like I've been in a terrible accident, but whatever... T actually said at one point-- who do you WANT to look like? I'm not particularly enamoured with anyone right now. I said "a donkey with lipstick" that was funny. I think he said that I look really nice when I get dressed up (he's seen me "pre-job interview" twice now). I think (ugh) he even said that he thinks I'm attractive. etc etc etc. We weren't getting anywhere, but at least he made me see that I not hideous
2) I feel awkward in social situations, like an outsider. Discussed how I am likeable. I told him that the "likeability" was an act. He vehemently disagreed, challenging my superego to a duel. That my social self is an integral part of me, and that my disgust for myself was just a delusion. I remarked that I feel like an elephant. "but you're NOT an elephant" but I feel like an elephant. He said "well that's okay-- you feel like an elephant, but also remember that you're NOT an elephant!
(I love elephants, btw)
3. I couldn't think of a third one, because I'd already been sitting there for 55 minutes.
he remarked on the way out the door. "glad we got you all fixed up-- when I see you Friday you'll be a brand new Llurpsie with brand-new self-esteem". I rolled my eyes, smiled and thanked him
okay, end of saga.
poster:llurpsienoodle
thread:851774
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080906/msgs/852154.html