Posted by susan47 on August 29, 2008, at 14:37:16
In reply to More Hugs Susan, posted by WaterSapphire on August 29, 2008, at 3:31:39
I just can't' stand it, I can't stand the way he set himself up to be this great Doctor, the way there's this boundary between him and the rest of "us".
It's my own craziness talking, my own need runs deep into my legs, the anxiety covers me like a blanket of familiar gut-wrenching angst,
and I Love Him So Much I can hardly breathe, because I really did truly fall in Love with him. I love him so much.
I would never hurt him for the world, I would never want to hurt him, but my soul tells me I did, I soul is screaming with the anxious knowledge, the sure knowledge that I am hurting him by doing this.
And I must stop.
And I will.
Because nothing in life matters as much as our mental and emotional health and wellbeing.
And I'm sick and tired, absolutely full up to HERE, with being the martyr I was taught to be by my own mother.I want to be free.
I want to be free.
Let me free.
Let me free.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love myself.
I love myself.
I love myself.
Am I worth it?
Am I worth it?
Am I?Is it possible to love me?
Am I lovable?
Was I ever lovable?
Can I be properly loved?
Oh, God, where are you?
I think I am sick.
Am I sick.
Is my mind sick, or is there more than my mind?I think I must study Jung.
I think I must.
I must do this, I have to get better, I have to get Well, and Healed, and be Whole.F*ck it.
poster:susan47
thread:848393
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080826/msgs/849020.html