Posted by MissK on February 26, 2008, at 19:09:13
Yesterday was an interesting session for me in a few different ways.
It was the first session in a loong time that tears did not come up at some point during the conversation. It is interesting to be able to talk with your T without cuts of pain coming through and your eyes not welling up.
It was the first session ever that I actually had what felt like moments of feeling relaxed. It was odd that I found myself twice leaning full back into the chair feeling a relaxation, almost like you would sit back and relax talking to a favourite and dear friend or something. It felt odd and I didn't exactly sink into it the feeling either. lol. I went back to my more 'formal' sit kind of closer to the edge of the chair.
But the darn part has to do with how the conversation went. I went into the session not really feeling or identifying like there was really too much overly troubling or debilating me emotionally and mentally. I just felt a kind of weariness and I wanted to address some thoughts I have been having more recently about my outside surroundings versus emotional and mind stuff. I noticed with something we were talking about she kept on a certain track of explaining something and I was listening and just kind of finding it interesting, but somehow it didn't seem to be 'clicking' for me.
Then, about 10 or 12 minutes before the end of the session, something did click and started to make alot of sense and I could see that there was something opening up in my mind to want to talk about and explore some more with her. Arggh. But then the session was over and it was time to leave. Now, I am finding there is a developing train of thought and conversation of what I could say and talk about with her. But it will have to wait two weeks! Darn. How much more useful I could have used that time.
It is interesting though to see how things can be going along a certain way for quite a period of time in therapy and then, for whatever reason, you can have an almost totally different experience. Yesterday was like that in a few notable ways. It will be interesting to see what the next session will be like after this one.
poster:MissK
thread:814855
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080226/msgs/814855.html