Posted by Racer on February 7, 2008, at 13:42:27
In reply to Re: FRUSTRATED » Kath, posted by Maxime on February 7, 2008, at 11:04:37
I think a lot of people in the mental health field use "borderline" as a heuristic, rather than a diagnosis based on criteria listed in the DSM or ICD. For some, it means "someone who doesn't get better in five sessions." It's too bad -- kinda erodes the useful meanings of the diagnosis, you know? At any rate, beyond the immediate, practical problems it may cause you, if I were standing in front of you, I'd roll my eyes, and say, "Don't even listen to what she's got to say."
OK, for moving forward, and getting past this problem:
When I've been in a similar situation, the worst obstacle I've had to face was my own paralysis. I get hopeless, and suck back inside myself, which certainly hasn't helped me much. The one thing that has helped with that more than anything else I've found was writing lists. I would write a list of three or four things to do, and those were the only things I'd even try to do that day. Some days, I only put one thing down, because I was feeling that bad. When I was trying to find a therapist or psychiatrist, and didn't have the money or the insurance to do so, I went through the telephone book and made a list of names and telephone numbers. Then, each day, I'd call three or four of them, and ask if they could see me at a reduced rate. Some were very clear -- nope, if you can't pay full price, I want nothing to do with you. For those who would speak with me, I not only asked about sliding scales, I also asked if they had any advice about where else I could try for getting treatment. Eventually, I found a free clinic for meds -- and a doctor there I *really* liked -- and a therapist who would see me for a fee of just $35. (Since average then was about $140 in that area, that was amazing!) In the course of that, I also tried all sorts of other options, even at one point trying a priest who saw anyone regardless of religion. (He wasn't for me at all, though -- I was feeling hopeless, severely depressed, and suicidal. He told me that was being disrespectful of God -- that way, I could be hopeless, severely depressed, suicidal, and guilty about being disrespectful of God...) The best thing I learned, though, was to ask everyone if they could recommend other avenues to me.
Aside from the telephone book, I called all the crisis lines I could find, and asked them for recommendations. Not necessarily specific names, but what they recommended in terms of going about my search. That was helpful, for the most part.
I know you and I have talked about this, but here's another idea: you've mentioned that your current T has suggested the intensive outpatient program -- that would give you access to some therapy while you're waiting for a space to open up with someone in your area. It's worth discussing your reservations with this T, and considering whether it might be the best plan for you after all. It would provide a base of support for you while you're waiting for a longer term solution, and I really think you need that. (Question: if you did take that option, would you be seeing him while part of the program? Also, would you have to do the full program? Or would you be able to tailor it, say three days a week instead of five?)
I hate to say it, but I think your ED may have something to do with what that other woman had to say. I'll keep my mouth shut on that, too, though...
As for the five sessions and what to work on, that's a tough one and I will put my brain to it. I just can't promise I can come up with anything at all useful.
xoxo
poster:Racer
thread:811072
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080126/msgs/811302.html