Posted by Dinah on October 16, 2007, at 20:19:04
In reply to Re: Therapist away for just a week, posted by rskontos on October 16, 2007, at 19:16:02
It's so hard to keep that feeling sometimes. It's like something snaps inside of me, and I can't reconnect.
I do think our relationship has changed a lot. He says so too. I found out a week or two ago that a consulting psychologist from years ago had told him I said something to her that surprised him. (I never did say it. She must have misunderstood. I use words oddly sometimes.) I was a bit upset she said it but more upset he hadn't asked me about it. I asked him if something similar happened now, would he mention it? After some thought he said that yes he would. He said that our relationship had gotten closer since then and he'd now just ask me if something was bothering him. That felt kind of good.
I think it was Katrina. Things changed so much then. Sometimes I wonder if they've changed so much that it sounds odd to others. It's not that the boundaries aren't still there, and tightly enough kept by both of us. But there is also an intimacy and honesty borne of shared experiences. It's hard to explain.
And yet it also made the boundaries more starkly clear than they ever were before. What he could be to me. What he couldn't be to me. His priorities. His limitations.
I was wrong. I have had time to miss him. Which is silly.
poster:Dinah
thread:789497
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20071009/msgs/789646.html