Posted by Happyflower3 on September 26, 2007, at 8:57:36
In reply to Re: I don't think the EMDR is stoping » Happyflower3, posted by frida on September 25, 2007, at 21:58:31
Thank you so much Frida for saying everything you did. I so needed some support right now. I am glad someone understands how I feel about my T.
Even my new T says it is different than what he orginally thought. He said in training they are trained in how to deal with the sexual or parental transference, but not in the feelings I have for my T, so maybe that is why he was uncomfortable with it. He said my T probably didn't know how to deal with it. But my new T says that now he knows more of the story, he understand my reaction to it, and my deep feelings.
What hurts is my old T knew that seeing him at the gym was a comfort to me, I told him. I knew it would be hard to leave him but in my mind I thought i could do it since I would not loose all connection to him. But now he hasn't been at the gym in over a month, and it just feels(i know irrational thinking) that he is trying to hurt me by doing it or he is mad at me. Maybe he is having his own struggles with it too. I did fire him, and in the other times, he seems distressed about it. We had a neat relationship and he has to miss it too I think.I called and made an appointment last night to see my T today. We didn't fully process the EMDR, so I feel like emotions are so on the surface and I hope my T can relieve some of that today. It is so painful, it will probably be so intense today, I am scared, but I need my T , i really do. He can help me get through this.
I have a lesson today and rehearsal tonight, it will hard because EMDR makes me so exhausted and the rehearsal goes until 9:45 tonight. But I can do this, I will get through this, I will be okay .
Thank you Frida, your support and understanding means a lot to me. It is hard to know what I need when I need support,( I am just not used to having anyone to support me) but you gave me just what I needed today to get through it all.
poster:Happyflower3
thread:785159
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070916/msgs/785276.html