Posted by Dory on September 16, 2007, at 19:16:00
My life stresses have not eased up and continue to mount.. i don't know what to do about new issues, old issues... so much i need guidance on.. so much i am stuck in. But we have just started past work, and i don't know that it's a good idea to step away from that just yet. i think maybe over time we will go back and forth some, but we have only had one session of past stuff.. too early?
i am unsure of myself. the ground feels unsure under my feet and i am overwhelmed often by floods of memory. There has been a lot building up since that poor attempt years ago.. my mind knows what levers to pull. Something in me has been waiting to do this and it will be hard to keep the flow at a managable rate.
i am afraid to see him, but i cannot wait to see him it seems. i feel i need to.. which is good right? it means maybe i am getting more attached?
i have a fear... i do see a deeper attachment forming, but it's gotten stronger quickly.. and after the call issue. My fear is that it got stronger after i perceived he was doing something hurtful towards me. i once told him it was difficult to attach to him because he treated me too well, he was too nice to me. My last T made a number of mistakes which hurt me, and yet i formed a very very strong attachment to him and very quickly. Maybe i am becoming attached because he hurt me?
so what do i do tomorrow? how do i best spend my $140? current crisis? past work?
poster:Dory
thread:783326
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070916/msgs/783326.html