Posted by DAisym on June 30, 2007, at 15:30:11
In reply to Re: Struggling with the concept of Need » DAisym, posted by Honore on June 30, 2007, at 9:35:38
Funny, you are the second person this week to suggest I write a book. Can you imagine? It would be way too long and wordy. "he said, then I said and then he said..." :)
I've decided to feel better today. My therapist would laugh at that statement, but I think it is true. This free floating anxiety isn't doing me any good and there is work to do and a house to clean. And the sun is out. So I'm going to kick my own butt in gear and just get things done. Maybe that is really what I "need" to do...
I do want to say, in thinking about it, I think the disconnect from my therapist may be linked to the group therapist - you used the right word - disappointment. I know that I need to protect myself better and I also know that working out some of my issues with women is a good thing. I tend to push myself really hard when I'm with other women and hide the vulnerable parts. I think this happened in group. Instead of saying, "I can't do this, even if it was my idea" I made myself say things. And I wanted the group therapist to step in and stop me and she didn't. So I played out, again, the scenario with my mom...silently wishing to be saved, her not doing it...so realizing again that *I* have to save myself.
And you know, that isn't really such a bad thing. Because ultimately, the goal is to leave therapy and take care of myself around all these feelings. So this is good practice. I think I can say, "I have needs and I can meet these needs myself." Which is a big change from "I must never have needs."
...or something like that.
poster:DAisym
thread:766025
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070628/msgs/766907.html