Posted by cubic_me on April 21, 2007, at 16:57:04
In reply to Anxiety and dysthymia, posted by peddidle on April 20, 2007, at 16:33:25
> Now to follow-up... do I have to be depressed all the time to have depression? I've felt OK for most of today, but maybe it's just the nice weather.
Ofcourse you don't have to feel depressed all the time to have depression, though I know how it feels to think you should (otherwise you might feel like you aren't "really" depressed). The clinical definition of depression includes persistant low mood, that doesn't preclude it from fluctuating a little. If you fluctuate enough you might be called cyclothymic or bipolar, but it doesn't mean the depression you feel during the down times is any less intense than someone who's down all the time.
>I was feeling anxious when I was in the library trying to work on my paper, and now I'm back at my house feeling kind of "eh." I feel fine, not sad at all, but not as good as just a little while ago. This also leads me to think that the fact that the anxiety/suicidal ideation gets worse when I'm trying to do schoolwork has more to do with being lazy and procrastinating and not wanting to do the work, than it does with being depressed.
I don't know about you, but when I'm doing something engrosing, the suicidal thoughts seem further away, but when schoolwork is tough and not really what I'm interested it can make any emotion I'm feeling more intense, especially depression or ideation.
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> I felt kind of depressed most of the day yesterday, including during my session. I was pretty upset after my session when I was trying to work on my paper, also. So, my T wanted me to call or email her if I decided I wanted to get something from the health center to help with the anxiety from the suicidal ideation (i.e. ativan, xanx, klonopin) so that I can write my papers, or even if I just wanted to hear her talk. She also said I could see her for a half hour on Monday to work on some kind of "plan of attack" for my papers. I really don't want to bother her, though, and she's probably gone for the day anyway. I know she wouldn't have offerred if she didn't truly mean it, but it still feels like an imposition. Plus, I only have two more weeks until the end of the semester, and I don't want to start getting "clingy" now, when I know I won't see her over the summer.Your T sounds lovely, if you need her or the health centre, please use them, that's what they're there for and they want to help. I can understand about not wanting to get too attached at this stage of term, I was like that too, but if you can get a couple of really useful or insightful sessions in before the vacation it can help to carry you through.
>Although, she said she's not cool with me not being in therapy over the summer, so maybe I can finagle some kind of email or phone session arrangement with her, or drive to her other office every other week or something. :)
That sounds like a really good idea, it's worth asking if she's able to put something in place for you.
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> I can't tell if I'm really that anxious or not. I mean, I think I'm just an an anxious person in general, so maybe I can't distinguish "normal" anxiety from excessive anxiety anymore. I don't know if I really need to take anything. I guess it can't hurt to try it once, but I also don't want to make the depression/anxiety worse.Have you talked to your T about your anxiety? There might be some things you can do before you start taking meds for it, like insight work, relaxation, breathing techniques etc.
>I also sometimes feel like I have to act depressed so that my T will know that I really don't feel that great. Like, if I feel OK before my session, and I walk in there smiling and happy, that she won't think I'm depressed. I hate how I can feel OK during a session, and then feel like complete sh*t a couple hours later, or vice versa. It makes me feel like, either way, I'm lying to her. At this point, if I'm happy if/when I see her on Monday, will it give her further evidence for her theory that could be a little cyclothymic, or can dysthymia work that way too?
I'm dysthymic and still have good days sometimes. Do you find you can seem happy on the outside, even feel happy to some extent, but have something inside you that's still really sad or depressed? Or are you truely happy? I think that goes part of the way to explaining whether you are dysthymic or cyclothymic, but really a diagnosis is just a label and doesn't change who you are inside. I felt I had to put on fake happiness to many, and fake sadness to a few sometimes, for fear of them thinking I was something I wasn't, and it felt like lying. It was always something I was too scared to discuss with my T, but I wish I had. I'm sure she'd have understood.
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> Can I be anxious and depressed? Can anxiety be a symptom of depression? Can I still feel OK, or even happy sometimes and still have depression or dysthymia?
Mixeed anxiety and depression is really common, and depression with associated anxiety is too. If you're anxiety is something that's bothering you or affecting your life, it's definately worth having a chat to your T or doc about if you can.cubic_me x
poster:cubic_me
thread:751683
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070419/msgs/752068.html