Posted by gardenergirl on April 19, 2007, at 16:28:08
In reply to post-therapy follow-up, posted by crushedout on April 19, 2007, at 14:23:00
Crushed! I was just thinking about you when I logged in just now. Your name is still on my yahoo IM list, and I saw it and wondered how you were. Freaky?
And what you describe is freaky, too, especially her response and her husband's response. Even more evidence of a real boundary problem which can and does cause real damage to clients.
I'm glad to hear you and your T have a good relationship. You so deserve that after all you went through before. And you seem pretty balanced about all this compared to a few years ago, which is great to see. :)
I agree with your T that it's in your hands and up to you what you do with this info. I totally understand wanting to talk to your ex-T and tell her about all the wrongs and what effect it had. I totally get that, and I've done it with my ex-pdoc. I think it's a toss-up whether that would wind up being satisfactory, though. It takes an awful lot of mental and emotional energy to do it. I had everything all written down, which helped, but it took awhile to do that. And I was getting really obsessed about it. In my case, I knew that talking to her would help me stop obsessing, which was a good thing. That was basically my goal in talking to her, but of course I secretly wished she would say, "Gee, you're right. I have treated you badly. Gosh, I'll have to really work hard to improve" yada yada yada. That was a big fat pipe dream with pretty much no chance of coming true. So if I had talked to her with that in mind, or maybe with the goal of getting her to react at all, then talking to her probably wouldn't have been a good idea. As it turned out, I did stop obsessing, I realized she truly was clueless about what I needed and how I was doing, and I was pretty much done with it after that. Well, except for the occasional joke about some of her more ridiculous lines, but hey...what can you do?
Okay, enough about me, but I hope hearing about my experience helps you in some way. It's really good to see you.
namaste
gg
poster:gardenergirl
thread:751291
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070419/msgs/751388.html