Posted by Lindenblüte on December 1, 2006, at 14:18:41
In reply to Transference » Dinah, posted by happykat on December 1, 2006, at 13:06:27
Hi Happykat,
The fact that you recognize the transference is a really good thing. It makes it a lot easier if you're already able to recognize these feelings and use some words to describe them.I had some transference issues towards my old T.
I'm 27 and he's perhaps 55?
First he reminded me of my college thesis advisor, so I tried to use the same kind of joking tone.
I was getting more and more anxious every time I saw him for a while. I felt more and more out of it after sessions where we actually talked about my past. working on the present was fine. I actually had panic attacks before several sessions. not good!
By this point, he was reminding me more and more of Hannibal Lecter. Of course, it didn't help that he referred to his work with the criminally insane at some institution.
By the time I realized what was going on, it was too late for me to deny that I was terrified of any and all men who see my vulnerabilities. Flashbacks, nightmares, etc... I told him about how terrified I was, and that I had something important to tell him. Would he help me say it?
You bet he helped me say it. Afterwards he said that I was probably reliving the trauma every single time I came to therapy, and that I might be more comfortable working with a female T (you think?!?).
After THAT session (whew) he told me that this was very satisfying to him as a therapist, because it meant that I was ready to work on deeper issues. He said that no matter how hard I tried, the feelings of terror "it's just transference, you know?" would make continuing therapy with HIM unnecessarily unpleasant. He said that he was really proud of me, and other nice things. and then referred me to my current T. (great referral, btw)
so, I think that admitting the transference first to yourself, and eventually to your therapist provides a real opportunity. You can figure out why you are feeling these things, how to understand them, and how to use them to make you stronger and wiser.
best to you,
-Li
poster:Lindenblüte
thread:709176
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061123/msgs/709410.html