Posted by Lindenblüte on October 24, 2006, at 12:12:45
In reply to Re: ok-Mebbe this will help others too... » Lindenblüte, posted by muffled on October 23, 2006, at 23:42:09
Muffled's in scientist mode?!?
Very cool!
Wanna come work for me?
I need me a good scientist.I get in scientist mode too.
Only, I'm interested in how to understand the bad stuff.
I wish I could get interested in the science ofJoy
Mirth
Happiness
Satisfaction
Ecstasy
Humor
LoveOr do I assume that we are all born innocent creatures, full of love and wonder, and it's our experiences with the world that gradually train us to respond differently to different situations?
My T said that my love for husband is probably the only love that remains (for the most part) untainted with fear.
Unlike love for my mom (is tainted with anger, disappointment).
love for my cat, which is limited to the moments when she's being a sweetiekitty
Love for my dad that never really was allowed to germinate, and the seed is slowly turning to dust, as I lose hope of ever connecting with him at that level.d
Love for my little brother that is guarded with trying to protect him from the darker side of his family.
Love for my older brother that is poisoned with fear and hatred, jealousy and competition.
So, that's love. Pretty easy.
But what about happiness? Why do I feel happy when the sun strikes my skin? Why do I feel happy when the air rushes through my hair and I'm zooming downhill (on my skis, or my bike, or a motorcycle?)
At other times, sun on my skin gives me anxiety about cancer and damage. Zooming downhill as I run away is a terrible feeling indeed, as I am little and will surely be overtaken!
What is it that allows us to feel the good stuff? Is it taking away the layers of poisonous dread, anxiety, fear, anger? Or is it an addition of vitamin "happy" that is opaque and blocks out the expression of fear anger etc. that lies underneath?
Are emotions/moods/feelings 2 or more opposing voices (streams of consciousness, to be more precise) and they are all active, all the time. Only sometimes one of them is yelling louder, drowing out the voices of the others?
Where did the voices come from?
Do I share the same streams of consciousness with others? Can I borrow one of theirs for a bit? (I'd like to borrow my T's sense of calm and comfort sometimes; or my ex-T's sense of energy and purpose, or my husband's wonder, or my friend Muffled's wit.)
Or are we all little separate bubbles of thought-worlds, isolated, yet transparent to one another, who keep on bumping into each other. Sometimes bouncing, sometimes sticking?
...sigh...
I miss Alex.
-Li
poster:Lindenblüte
thread:696451
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061012/msgs/697317.html