Posted by pegasus on October 3, 2006, at 22:34:47
So, after much pondering of my recent session with my ex-T, I think I've realized what was going on when my therapy with him was ending a few years ago.
We had about 7 or 8 sessions after he told me he was moving. He says that during that time he was trying to appeal to the strong, healthy side of me. I guess the idea was to help me see how much I had already healed, and that I could call on those resources to keep me from sliding back into my pre-therapy non-functionality. He said he was trying to "shore me up." He was trying to create an ending that left me feeling supported, so I wouldn't fall apart.
What it seemed like to me, though, was that he was denying or minimizing the hurt and afraid part of me. So, I felt really unsupported, and unheard. And I felt that my pain and fear was unwelcome, or didn't matter.
So, I ended up totally misinterpreting him. And he totally missed what I really needed. It was a big miss all around.
So, I'm glad I had a chance to talk to him and realize what we were both really doing.
Not sure if I'll be wanting to talk to him again. I think maybe. Maybe I want to have a chance to ask him to tell me how my hurt and pain really did matter. And how he felt about moving away and leaving my therapy so unfinished. He's mentioned in general how it felt to close his practice, but I think I might need to hear him say something more specific to me.
p
poster:pegasus
thread:691665
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060926/msgs/691665.html