Posted by pegasus on September 19, 2006, at 9:06:04
In reply to Re: What ethics?, posted by alexandra_k on September 19, 2006, at 4:29:41
Yes, I agree with what everyone says, but most of all with what alexandra said about it being hard to find the exact right place to put the boundaries. I mean, sure, I don't want him to promise anything he can't give. And actually, I don't even want him to give any more than he seems to be planning to. (Although at one time I sure did.) But is it really outside the necessary protective boundaries to show a little feeling? I mean, something like "it's nice to hear from you". Does that really have much potential to lead me toward unrealistic expectations? Especially when it comes with all of the other boundary setting?
And besides, if showing me a little caring would be healing for me, then why is it necessarily better to keep to such strict boundaries that preclude any mention of caring? I mean, is preventing me from potentially developing new transferential hopes more important than helping me heal from real past wounds?
I hope not, 'cause that's what I'm planning to talk about on Thursday. I'm going to post my "story of therapy" that I wrote last weekend when I get a chance. I'm thinking I'll try to read it to him, by way of explaining how our ending affected me and what might help me heal now.
p
poster:pegasus
thread:687097
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060911/msgs/687364.html