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Re: do i really need therapy anymore?

Posted by llrrrpp on August 5, 2006, at 17:20:32

In reply to Re: do i really need therapy anymore? » llrrrpp, posted by Dinah on August 5, 2006, at 8:36:48

Thank you all for your kind support,
I have already been tapering off, so to speak. I was seeing T once a week for about 12 weeks straight, and then I had 3 weeks off, and then 2 weeks off, and now another 2 weeks off, because Ive been out of town.

I guess Im not sure. the thing is, that this summer i feel great. but i have also been out of town a LOT and i worry that when i get back, and when im back in the daily grind, that I wont quite know how to hold onto the feeling.

I also worry that all the good feelings i have are only because of my psychopharmacological interventions, and not because ive actually DEALT with anything in my life, like my fathers near death and chronic illnesses, my feelings of being abandoned by mom, and wondering whether i have chosen the right career path, the verbal abuse and psychological torture at the hands of my brother, and the list goes on and on... I guess i better figure out whether this stuff can actually be dealt with, or perhaps how to avoid such stuff in the future. I dunno.

I saw a movie about the last 12 day of hitlers 3. Reich today. it was pretty intense. i didnt really feel it. it didnt disturb me nearly as much as it should have. am i back to suppressing all feelings of grief and sympathy? i mean, why cant there be a happy medium, where i am neither triggered nor completely numb about such matters?

i guess my uncertainty is a sign that i should discuss this further with T. I guess my only concern is that when im no longer deemed a threat to myself, i will be cut off from therapy anyways. (insurance policy?) and so, why not figure out sooner rather than later whether i can make it on my own. i have an everlasting prescription for the mind altering substances, so-- that's something, right?

well, im kinda mixed up today. better run. sorry for the crappy punctuation. the keyboard in germany is all crazy!!
´
Deine,
ll


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